This is a pretty useful article, especially for lost souls like myself, which is exactly the reason I am linking to it here.
I should point out that as of this moment I have been sitting in this little internet room at the bottom of my guest house for nearly an hour. I don't have anything to do today, except maybe go and pick up those silk shirts I ordered and collect my suit fromthe tailor's. Or I could do that tomorrow. So maybe today I will simply sit and think about what I want to do with my life (like that hasn't been the driving question keeping me awake forever). ONe day I will find a way to melt all the guns and ammo into goo and have all those wonderful people who work in landmine factories go to Somalia and Indonesia to clear them out so that the people who live there can once again walk around and grow food in their area.
One day....

what's on the box?

Ever have a song pop into your head soemtimes and it won't go away?
For days I have been singing this to myself (or trying to, on account of my testicles dropped already). And I can remember years ago, for some reason, this little gem would float into my head. These are not songs I really "like" (they would never make it onto any CD I compile for repeat play) and yet they are on circulation in my head, popping into my consciousness at random moments. How does this work? Still, at least it ain't this

that sinking feeling

I was tooling along the canal on my little nifty today, just coming back from up the Wat and the thought occurred to me that more than a few drunken fools must find themselves driving into that ring of water that surrounds central Chiang Mai. IMany times while playing GTA3 I have misjudged a bend or jump and splashed down into a river or lake, drowning my violent little criminal. He could swim fine on his own, but he could never seem to escape from his car under the water. This got me to thinking: well, is it a given fact that a person necessarily will die if their car takes an unforeseen plunge into some local body of water and if survival is possible, how so? Obviously opening the doors is out of the question - water pressure will keep that from happening. You're going out the window if you're going anywhere at all. Anyone who wants to be prepared to be the hero of their submerged car disaster, here is a good link to follow. It contains interesting facts that I didn't know.

chaing mai is cool

Had a nice night with Lee then caught the flight to Chiang Mai and slept most of the day.
Next day I got me a biCycle and rode around town, essentially i was looking for this particular wat to go on a meditation course at. When i got there i changed my mind. I just decided i don't really want another introduction to silly old buddhism, even if i do get to lern some meditation techniques. I guess maybe my old ego got stuck in and pulled it's ass out of the fire again. Self improvemt seeyalater.
So i rode around all day and it didn't take long for my ass to regret the decision, even if i enjoyed stretching my legs and doing something more physical than carnal excercise. Checked out the Insect Museum and an Art Museum. Had a nice roadside dinner. It was pretty cool - all plastic equipment. I did the Tony Bourdain and just pointed to the guy next to me, said: "Same same" and the lady brought me the same same as him. Tasty!
yesterday I did a little trek. Jumped in a bus with a pommie couple, 2 irish lasses, 2 swiss couples and 2 german girls and off we were driven to somewhere far away. Walked through some rainy jungle, crossing rivers and slipping in mud. The jungle (and the road there, actually) reminded me a lot of New Zealand (Thai people also drive on the left). Got back to the Place and had some lunch. Veryone except me rode elephants for an hour. I decided i'd rather hang back and play that volleyball football game with the little cane ball with the rafting instructors and tour operators. I don't really dig on riding elephants, unless i'm actually going somewhere. Seems kinda childish otherwise.
So anyway, after that we all did the whitewater rafting and a little bamboo rafting too, in the rain and rabpids all. Fun factor 8
Last night i went out with this dutch guy i met, and a french couple he had met down south and we had a pretty good time. Today we all had lunch together and it looks like we'll be doing a cookery course together on saturdy. And tomorrow i'm going mountain biking with the dutch guy. Even though my body is aching like rocks. I gotta go get massaged again.
Also, i think someone filched through my wallet so i have lost more money. Fuck it who cares.
Bye now!

today i am very sad

I took my ipod down to the internet place today to charge it up, but imagine my shock and dismay upon discovering a rainbow bordered black hole on the screen. It won't turn. Basically my iPod is now fucked, so that's about $1000 down the tubes. And I lost the receipt too.
So here is its eulogy:
My iPod was my best friend. I first bought my iPod only after months of deliberation as to th whether it would be worth it to spend all that cash on something that could so easily become nothing more that a lump of metal and fizzled circuitry, or worse, become a space where it used to be. In the end, I was swayed by my desire to carry all my music and interviews, meditations and so on around with me everywhere i go.
For months, my ipod has bee n my companion through journeys and naps, guiding me through meditations and workouts, and generally keeping me company with my favourite sounds.
But all that ended recently, I suspect during the sudden downpour that saturated me and all my stuff as I rode pillion from the small village in Ko Tao to the AC resort.
As usual, I'm not as upset as I feel I should be; I'm just disappointed that once again, my prediction, predilection for misfortune, and the universe have once again worked together to deprive me of a sanity-saving device. The concept of a 13 hour plane trip to NZ without my iPod is appalling. I don't even want to think about it, but I must do something. O! Despair!

....and so forth

I feel different no that I'm on Ko Tao. The coin says that I only stay here for 2 nights (last night being one of them) and then move on back tothe mainland. Matt suggested a meditation retreat which sounds lke a plan, but I'm also considering a massage course too. Except for the expense it sounds lke a good plan, especially as I just don't feel like meeting people and making friends. NOt that I ever regret it when I do, it's just... I don't know.
Anyway, today I'm going for a dive (finally) and taking my wee camera down with me. The sky is blue and so is the sea. Ko Tao is the best diving in Thailand they say, and it's a little quieter on the island right now because people have flocked down to Ko Pha Ngan for the monthly full moon party. The whole 'big rave' thing doesn't appeal to me in the slightest anymore.

Hmm.. well, that's all not very interesting is it? How about what happened on ko Samui?
Well, I did a bit of trekking around; rode an elephant, saw a tiny waterfall (after a big hike) and checked out a butterfly house. Mostly though I jsut felt ill and slept. I met some people; some english, some americans who pretended to be mexican to avoid the negative US stereotype.
I went dancing on the night of the world cup final becuase the big screens set up in every bar made it possible to dance and watch at the same time. The music is pretty good there, for what it is - a bit house-y with liberal doses of pop and the same songs every night as you'd expect. Damn I'm getting stomach cramps again, I better sign off. More again after my dive.

thailand!

sawadee!
So i've been here for the better part of a week. Landed in Bangkok late Friday night/early Saturday morning and went straight to my hotel. There i met a pair of boisterous Irish boys enjoying some beers, the Argentina-Italy game, and the company of some delightfully sexy Thai girls. They filled me in on some details of living right where we are and in spite of my insistence that i wasn't interested in smoking anything, I found a foil package in my hand when C shook it goodbye. I assiduously and rather ungraciously flushed it down the loo becuase I just don't wanna deal with that. Glad I did too cos I got walloped with a massive dose of the sads about my second or third day. reverse culture shock maybe? An unwillingness to step forth and be a social man? Anyway, thanks to a new friend I have worked around that issue, mostly.
So here I am, finally out of the steamy city; now in Koh Samui staying ina bungalow near the beach called Hat Chaweng. There a plenty of half naked white people wandering around, and while I've barely been to the beach so far, the view down there is gorgeous wnough to warrant my plan to spend the entire day there with no adventures of any kind.
plans for the future: maybe some scuba diving (my back is pretty fucked and I Bangkok belly just couahgt up with me. my colon is clenching as I write this. not a good prognosis for diving). The are some jetskis so I can see myself riding one of those puppies all day tomorrow. what would relaly rock my world would be some frisbee or soccer or cricket, or even some chess. I suppose I will have to make that happen myself, as that's the way the world seems to work these days. Today, however, I am resting myself from the necessity to make contact. I will lie on a chair under an umbrella sipping beer and reading sci-fi like a good geek should. Tonight may be a diffrent story.